The germ of this post was a waspish remark by a comrade in an email. If I can find enough people willing to be interrogated, it may become a regular (fortnightly?) feature. First in the dentist's chair is Voltaire's Priest (not his real job) of Shiraz Socialist. Some say he has wisdom beyond his years - but that's only if you think he tells the truth about his age.

How do you get up in the morning? With great trepidation.

What will you wear to storm the Winter Palace? Shades.

What is you favourite pizza topping? Jalapeño peppers. Loads of 'em.

Luxemburg or Lenin? Luxemburg, for all sorts of reasons that I can't be arsed to debate with Trots.

Haggis or jellied eels? Haggis. It's nice, and the thought of jellied eels turns my stomach.

Do you think Harry's Place has already passed its best point, or is the best yet to come? Harry's place is a cesspit of neoconservative ranting and right-wing shitespeak. But no, I'm not deleting my link to it.

Red or blue? Red in the UK, blue in the USA.

What do you think is the main threat to George Galloway's/Tommy Sheridan's/Robert Kilroy-Silk's permatan? Rain.

North or South? South - the food's better in the Med than it is in Iceland.

Beer or wine? Wine. Although I'm not fussy.

If you could have three people shot, who would they be? Barry Scott from the Cilit Bang advert, most 9/11 conspiracy theorists and Jerry Fal.. - oh wait, the last one's dead anyways.